when the city clears and sun ascends
by ivyandtwine
Summary: "She couldn't sleep, still wired after the day's events, the cold from the freezer lodged deep in her bones and not wanting to leave." A post-ep for Countdown (3x17). A fic for CastleFanficMonday


_Oh the warmth in your eyes swept me into your arms  
__Was it love or fear of the cold that led us through the night_

_Winter Winds - Mumford and Sons_

* * *

Kate raps twice on his door, the sharp sounds echoing through the quiet hallway. She hopes that she isn't waking him; it's only 11pm but the last two days have been draining. She couldn't sleep, still wired after the day's events, the cold from the freezer lodged deep in her bones and not wanting to leave. She had tossed and turned in her bed for an hour before deciding that sleep wasn't going to happen and built up her courage to come and see him. She's wearing pajamas - she hadn't bothered to change before coming here, had rather slipped on her coat and boots before leaving her apartment.

He opens the door reasonably quickly, suggesting that he wasn't sleeping either. His hair is mussed and he has a large blanket wrapped around his shoulders that drags on the ground behind him. He looks… adorable. Her stomach flips a little at the sight of him, some of her agitation and restlessness calming already. She tries to ignore the butterflies, to push down the thoughts of _what are we waiting for?_ swirling around her mind.

"Beckett?" He cocks his head, clearly surprised to see her at this time of the night.

"Hey, Castle, I'm- um, I'm sorry to be here so late, but, uh, I couldn't sleep and I just thought-" She stops herself there, not exactly sure what her next words will be. Glancing down, she notices his feet are covered in thick woolen bed socks. "I'm just so cold," she exhales, her body almost shivering at the words, and she pulls her eyes back to look at his.

His confused expression morphs into one of complete understanding and he gestures her inside.

"Well- uh, hey, come in. I have a lot of blankets, we can watch a movie, and I can make you some hot cocoa. Or you can have a bath, it's huge, basically a jacuzzi, you'll love it. Or-"

"-Castle," she interrupts, stopping his rambling before he can venture into ridiculous suggestions like trips to the equator. "Blankets and a movie sound great."

She smiles softly and follows him inside, the warmth from his furnace already seeping into her skin and spreading to her extremities. "Although, I may take you up on that bath a bit later." She loves her baths, and the thought of sinking back into what she can imagine is an enormous tub fills her with absolute delight.

"Well, I will be happy to run it for you whenever you want," he replies, flashing her a grin.

His expression drops; she can see the thoughts clouding his mind, and she's pretty sure she knows what's coming next.

"Um, Beckett?"

"Yeah?"

"Why isn't Josh the one keeping you warm?"

"We- uh, broke up."

"Oh. I'm sorry," he says, sounding like he actually means it.

"Yeah. Me too."

And she is. She had hoped there would be a chance to fix their crumbling relationship when Josh came back, but after today, after almost dying with Castle - again - she had been feeling uneasy all night. Josh had sensed this and brought it up, leading to a fight, one that had been a long time coming.

Castle clears his throat. "Well, why don't you go pick a movie, and I'll get started on the cocoa," he says, gesturing to his office and then turning to walk to the kitchen.

Kate hums in response and makes her way through the door in the gap of the open shelves. She finds his collection of DVDs, skims her hand over the alphabetized rows of movies. Finding three that she likes, she plucks them from the shelf and lays them down on his desk, deciding to let Castle make the final decision.

Turning, she spots the pile of extra blankets on his office couch and immediately reaches to grab a large fluffy one to wrap around herself. Dropping onto the soft cushions, she pulls her boots off and curls her knees up to rest her chin on them. Her body thrums with contentment, already significantly warmer than she was at her place. A chill still wracks her body however, and she supposes that it will take a while for the aftermath of the freezer to leave her system. She feels at home here, more than she'd like to admit usually, but the events in the last 48 hours are making her think that maybe this is a good thing, being here, being with him. She didn't plan to go straight to Castle's so soon after her break up, but she had craved him, craved his presence, and she's hoping that her actions tonight will be enough to express that she wants this.

A relationship with Castle.

Her heart tingles at that thought, feeling more real tonight than the previous times she has entertained it. Normally something that she dismisses, or puts it down to her dreams being overactive. She's not ready tonight, no, but someday soon she hopes. .

"Hey."

She opens her eyes, not realizing that she had closed them, and looks up to see Castle smiling down at her and holding two steaming mugs, an expression dancing in his eyes that almost feels like love. She ignores it for the time being, her heart already a little wild from earlier, but she can't help the way her lips curl upwards and her body instinctively cants towards him.

Kate reaches up for the cocoa with both hands, wiggling her fingers with enthusiasm. Castle huffs out a small laugh and hands over her mug with care. She cradles it in her palms, the ceramic almost too hot, but she revels in the warmth as she lifts it to her lips. She can feel Castle's eyes on her as she tentatively sips the steaming liquid, waiting for her verdict.

Oh. It's _good. _

And is that?-

"Nutella," he says, reading her mind as he so often seems to. "It makes a regular drink into an incredible drink."

"It's really good Castle. Best one I've ever had," she smiles up at him, relishing the sweet and creamy drink.

He smiles back, and wow, she should compliment him more often if it draws that expression on his face. A mixture of pride in himself, and adoration of her shines through and she wants to spend her days making him feel that way.

She drops her eyes and glances over at the DVDs she shortlisted. "I've picked three movies, do you want to make the final decision?"

He nods and sets his mug down on the table, then fans out the titles she has selected. She watches as he raises his eyebrows at her choices, pondering for a minute before selecting one from the three.

After inserting it into the DVD player Castle flops down on the couch, closer to Kate than they would normally consider appropriate. He grabs a blanket, drapes it over himself and then reaches for another one to place over the both of them. She finds herself having to shuffle a little closer so that the blanket can cover them both properly, but stills when she feel the heat of his thigh touching hers. He freezes too, but doesn't move away, and neither does she, so she settles further into the couch, and nudges him with her elbow.

"Hey, ow!"

"Press play, Castle," she says, nodding her head in the direction of the TV.

"Right, right." He grabs the remote and presses play, leaning back against the couch and causing their shoulders to brush and rest against each other. Her pulse quickens from the contact, now in two places, tingles spreading through her system, again, and wow, she really needs to calm her body's reactions. She decides to go with it, sinking back and causing her to lean further into him, and ok, yeah, this is nice.

The movie starts, and Kate lets out an involuntary sigh of contentment. She shifts her eyes to the left in the hopes that Castle won't say anything. His lips are turned up, evidently having heard her, but thankfully choosing to say nothing.

She relaxes once more, the warmth from the cocoa, the blankets and her partner making the chill from the freezer melt more and more by the minute.

* * *

About halfway through the movie Castle finds himself with a heavy weight upon his shoulder and looks down to see Beckett's head resting there. She must have been tired, but couldn't sleep at her place. He realizes that the heat and comfort of his place must have actually helped her. He longs for her to be like this every night, relaxed and comfortable with him, so much so that she falls asleep in his presence.

_That day may not be too far off, _he thinks, the words 'We broke up' still fresh in his mind. He _is_ sorry that they broke up, or more so that Beckett had to go through that hurt, but he can't help but wonder what this means for them.

He watches her sleep, definitely bordering on creepy, but he can't seem to tear himself away. His heart tightens as he stares, his feelings for her becoming overwhelmingly loud in the quiet of his office. Her features are slack, her face flushed from the probably too hot apartment. He wants to trace his finger down the slope of her nose, her forehead, her lips. Too intimate a gesture for tonight, he knows that. _Maybe next time. _

As he stares, he sees her brow furrow, her eyelids flicker, and the word adorable repeats over in his mind as he watches her dream. However, from the rapidly evolving expression on her face, that dream has turned into some kind of a nightmare. Castle turns towards her, worrying about what she could be dreaming of, the endless horrible scenarios that were so close to occurring in the last two days. He debates waking her, not wanting her to experience any type of nightmare relating to freezers, or bombs, or terrorists. The decision is made for him once she jerks and starts speaking.

"No!" she gasps. Castle shifts his body to face her completely, her head now resting on the back of the couch, and grabs her shoulders to try and wake her.

"Castle!" She's louder this time, and Castle's heart clenches. He's in her dream. _Nightmare._ She is almost crying the words, repeating his name and 'no', and this cannot be good.

"Beckett, I'm here, ok? Wake up, Beckett!" He runs his hand down her face to clasp at her jaw, and oh, thank God, her eyelids flutter open. She gasps again as she wakes and sits up.

"Castle?" Her breathing is heavy and he swears he can feel her heartbeat through her skin.

"Hey, Kate, it's okay, you were having nightmare, but you're okay now," he comforts, not wanting to let go unless she forces him.

Luckily that doesn't happen. Rather, she laces her arms around his neck and buries her face there. She breathes deeply, like she's inhaling him, and despite the circumstances he can't help but feel a wave of joy crash through him as he snakes his arm around her back and holds on tight.

"You died," she breathes, her lips brushing the side of his neck as she speaks. "In my dream."

Oh, Kate. No.

"I'm right here, Kate, I'm ok."

"I know. It was just- sorry- I just- need a minute?" she questions, and he almost laughs. As if he would ever voluntarily let her go.

"Take all the time you need Kate."

* * *

After Kate had calmed, Castle suggested running a bath, and despite her attempt at being casual, the light in her eyes had conveyed her excitement.

It was late now, but it seemed like sleep was not coming to them tonight. He has been filling the bathroom with candles, and chose two essential oils from Alexis' bathroom that included the word calming on the label. The bath is filling up, bubbles lining the surface, and he can't help but commend himself for transforming the bathroom into a place of relaxation.

Kate walks in as he lights the final candle and he spins to see the look on her face. She looks radiant in the glow of the flickering candles, and again his mind flashes to a time when they could be sharing the bath. He pushes down the longing for now and waves his hand to showcase his work.

"Wow, Castle, this looks incredible." He can see the way her eyes light up once she spots the huge tub filled with fluffy bubbles.

"It's all yours Kate, just give me a yell if you need anything." He leaves the bathroom for her and detours through his office to grab his laptop before settling into bed.

* * *

He has only been writing for ten minutes when he hears his name being called from the bathroom. He startles, laptop sliding off his thighs to rest on the covers, as he rushes to the door that separates them.

"Kate? You ok?"

"Yeah, I- can you come in?"

He recoils slightly from the door in shock, she can't seriously be asking-

"Castle?"

"Uh- yeah- Beckett, are you sure? You didn't find my wine stash or anything did you?"

Her laugh echoes through the door and he relishes the sound.

"It's fine Castle, I'm covered."

He slowly turns the handle, peeks his head through the door with his hand covering his eyes, but then splits his fingers to confirm her statement.

Oh. By covered she meant…

"Well I'm glad I borrowed Alexis' bubble bath now," he chokes out, overwhelmed by the sight of her in the water, bubbles clinging to her slick skin, rising up to just below her collarbone. Her hair is tied in a high bun, tendrils falling around her face, becoming curly from the damp. He longs to pull at them, tuck them behind her ear, run his hand down the droplets of water sliding down her face. He can't see much below the surface, but from the way her upper body is hunched he assumes she is wrapping her arms around her knees, pulling them up against her chest.

He can't breathe.

"Hey," she says, smirking at his reaction.

"What can I do for you?"

"Well, um, I realized I needed a towel-"

"Ah right, I'll grab one for you, they're just under the sink," he says, reaching down to the cupboard and pulling out a large chocolate-brown towel. He places it on a stool near the bath and starts to retreat from the room when she stops him.

"Castle, wait." Her face has sobered, lacking the teasing nature from before. "Could you stay?"

His face must be depicting confusion because she decides to continue.

"I mean, just in the room, I just- don't want to be alone." She ends on a mumble, shame of asking for such a thing lacing her voice.

"Yeah. Yes, of course, Kate. Anything you need." He sits down on the floor, but the cold tiles make him decide that sitting on a towel would be more comfortable, so places a spare towel near the bath and settles back down. He takes a risk and leans back against the wall of the tub, his shoulder in close proximity to where her damp hand rests along the edge.

It's silent for a few minutes, he isn't sure if he should be making conversation, although he's also not sure if he could make his sentences coherent just yet, the thought that he is sitting so close to a naked, wet Kate making his brain shut down. He doesn't know what has made her this uncharacteristically open, but he is happy to be brought along for the ride. If she's letting him be in here, asking for him when she doesn't want to be alone... he hopes it's the first steps to _more _between them.

A cold drop of water sliding down his neck startles him from his thoughts and makes his body jolt.

"Sorry," Kate says, and it's then that he realizes that the water has come from her hand, currently skimming the nape of his neck, teasing the short hairs there. He hopes she can't see the goosebumps that arise.

"S'ok," he replies; all the water in the world couldn't make him tell her to stop touching him. The hope from before has doubled, tripled, her intimate action making his heart swell with love-

Uh, he means…

Oh, screw it, he knows he's loved her for a while now.

Her fingers continue working up through his hair, nails scraping his scalp, and he has to stop himself from letting out a moan. He wants to ask what this means, but also wants this to never, ever stop.

She slows down, apparently has had enough of playing with his hair, and eventually stops to rest her hand back on the porcelain. He takes a risk, and turns his body sideways so they are facing the same direction. He tries not to look over, not wanting to push her boundaries, but instead lifts his hand, places it over hers and laces their fingers together. He hears her inhale, but she doesn't pull away, so he relaxes, starts rubbing his thumb slowly over the back of her hand.

Kate shifts back to lean more into the tub and the water rocks, bubbles shifting with the movement, and Castle gets a glimpses of her legs beneath the surface. He's the one to inhale now, but feeling Kate squeeze his hand in warning, he looks away.

They sit there in silence for maybe ten more minutes when Kate declares that she wants to get out.

"I'm started to look like a prune," she says, wiggling the fingers of the hand not holding his. He releases her hand reluctantly, and stands up.

"I'll be in the bedroom if you need me," he offers, and exits the bathroom to leave her to get dry and dressed.

* * *

Kate stands up in the tub, water droplets falling from her skin. She pulls the plug with her toes, steps out, and grabs the towel that Castle had left for her. She's trying not to thinking too hard about what just happened, about the huge step forward she had caused them to take.

That's what she wanted, wasn't it? To move forward?

She could tell how much her actions had meant to him and that thought makes heat spread through her veins. She likes making him happy, and she knows he feels the same. She can continue down this path of small gestures right?

She dries off and re-dresses in the pyjamas she had been wearing when she arrived. It is definitely too late to go home, and she finds herself not wanting to go back to her cold and empty apartment.

Kate opens the bathroom door and walks back into his bedroom, delight running through her at the fact that he is allowing her to see this space. Castle is propped up on the bed, fingers flying over his laptop keyboard. She assumes he is writing, and she hopes that it was her that had inspired this late night bout of storytelling.

She decides to be daring, and walks over to sit on the other side of his bed. _Small gestures_? Ok, this was maybe on the large side, but she doesn't want to sleep alone tonight.

He stops writing when he feels the bed bounce with her weight, and looks up at her, clearly not expecting her to be sitting next to him.

"Uh-"

"-Castle, is it ok if I stay here tonight? With you?" she interrupts.

Castle clears his throat. "Of course."

She settles back into the bed before he has time to question her actions, and pulls the covers up over her torso. Castle shuts down his laptop and places it on the floor, turning off the lamp in the process. They lay back against the pillow, turning to face each other, even though they are unable to see anything but mere outlines in the darkness.

"Kate?"

"Hmm?"

"What- I just- what are we doing?" he whispers.

She's silent, working out her answer in her mind before she speaks.

"Something, Castle. I want this to happen, I do," she starts, the blanket of darkness giving her courage to reach out and clasp his hand in hers. "I just, don't want to rush this, but, uh, I think it could be something great."

She can hear him suck in a breath, his other hand coming up to cover hers and squeeze hard.

"I do too."

"Talk tomorrow?" she questions, the exhaustion of the last two days - and tonight - finally weighing her down, as she feels herself drifting off.

"Yeah. Tomorrow."

Before she succumbs to sleep, she builds up her courage once more, and shifts closer to him. She untangles their hands to find his face, caressing his forehead as she leans in and presses her lips softly to his. It's a promise, a hint of what's to come. She feels him freeze, and finds herself not wanting to move away, so instead rests her head on the edge of his chest, near his shoulder and relaxes into him. He's still slightly in shock, and tingles run through her whole body, but once she lies down they both loosen. Castle brushes his lips over her forehead and wraps his arm around her back, the warmth of his body being the only source she needs.

* * *

_A/N My first fic, thank you for reading. A huge thank you to my betas_


End file.
